O&C Take Out

O&C Take Out - Women and Porn Stars

Tags: O&C Take Out ,  Sex and Society

This month's Take Out question is inspired by Jordan's discussion of hairy bodyparts, specifically, butholes, in Ask Jordan. The greater issue is, as sexuality, especially women's sexuality, becomes more acceptable and exploitable in main-stream society, how are women affected? There is an excellent essay by Erica Jong in Bad Girls: 26 Writers Misbehave, edited by Ellen Sussman. Jong argues that the public female sexuality we see on TV, the Internet and in public discourse is "as bogus and inhuman as implanted breasts. It is not a sexuality that breeds intimacy or empathy. It is the seuxality of an inflatable doll." (Sussman, p. 294) Jong goes on to discuss the fact that women continue to shape their bodies in accordance to what men see as sexy (i.e. waxing, breast implants, plastic surgery on the labia.)

It is important that as women's sexuality becomes mainstream, women understand and own their own sex-lives, their sexual selves, and their bodies (which is what O&C is all about!). Instead of worrying about whether or not our buttholes look as perfect and hairless as the porn star's, we should be paying more attention to our own pleasure.

And thus we come to March's Take Out Topic:

"Has watching porn (or even a music video!) ever affected how you behave in the bedroom, or how you think you're supposed to look to your partner? More importantly, what can women do to overcome comparisons and 'plastic standards' in their own minds and in their bedrooms?"

We look forward to reading your responses!

xoxo
Jordan & Samantha


* O&C Take Out is an exciting monthly section created just for our readers. If you think of reading the delectable O&C stories as "eating in," then Take Out is a way for us to order out for opinions, comments and discussion from our readers. Like an informal survey, we'll ask a question (of course, with a risque leaning), and invite you to give your thoughts and ideas about it. It's our hope to open up a dialogue between readers regarding all things erotic and sexual. We hope it's informative, inspiring and fun! To engage in the conversation, simply submit a comment at the bottom of the article. We look forward to reading what our plethora of sophisticated readers have to say!


Originally published March, 2008

Comments

• Kandy
  3/9/2008 12:12:47 PM

  i remember watchign porn with my last bf and being surprised at how vocal the girls were when i'm really quiet in bed. i started focusing on being louder and trying to put on a show and totally forgot to enjoy myself. it stopped me from getting to orgasm. so ya my advice is don't try to be a pornstar u should defnitely be yourself in bed and do it the way you do it best. i stay quiet now and rock out as many orgasms as i can. selfish lol!
• Vixie
  3/9/2008 10:51:16 PM

  It's the fake boobs that bum me out. When I video myself I get all self conscious about my tits which just don't stand up the way those porn girl's boobs do no matter what position they're in. Doggy style = dangly boobies for me...
• Alanna
  3/10/2008 12:13:51 PM

  I actually find that I get more turned on watching porn that feature natural-looking women. And one thing I can't stand is the fake moaning and groaning and screaming - sometimes it's easy to tell when a girl is actually in pain (like during a rough dp session), and it really grosses me out!
• Sara
  3/10/2008 12:19:38 PM

  I really like this question because I truly believe it's an important issue for women. We are at once both freed and cursed by sexual freedom and openness. We can be our own women, have sex with several different partners, even at the same time, if we want to. But we have to work hard to succumb to the unhealthy images we see in general media of tv and movies. I just think that if we embrace our sexuality, we also really need to embrace all of who we are physically. Personally, I try to do as many activities as I can naked in front of a mirror (brush my teeth, stretch, sometimes even dance) and love myself all the while. This way, I really know what I look like, and it's a positive experience for me.
• Z
  3/12/2008 9:53:44 PM

  I loooove my porn. But I wouldn't expect my girl to act like or look like a pornstar in bed. Tho I don't know if I would complain if she did...hmmmm
• V.C.
  3/12/2008 11:14:02 PM

  I LOVE porn but i don't necessarily take it too seriously in the bedroom. However, majority of the time my partner and i have costume sex and film each other, which makes me feel like a porn star! It's so much fun! I am myself while playing a role, improvising, having a laugh, plenty of orgasms, and just do what i do best.
• OMFG
  3/12/2008 11:29:54 PM

  COME OVA HERE BABY AND SHOW ME SOME FUCKING COSTUME SEX FUKK THATS SO HOT IT MAKS MY 9 INCH COCK TURN TO 10 AN A FUKIN HALF BABY A NURSE OUTFIT OR SUMSHIT YA
• JLR
  3/13/2008 9:27:57 AM

  Wow V.C. I think that if OMFG could speak English he would have said something like - that's so hot that you and your partner have so much fun in the sack and congratulations on your healthy outlook on porn. Oh he might have also mentioned something about an overwhelmingly large male member but I don't know if that would interest you as much. xoxo JLR
• Bdub
  3/16/2008 11:49:06 AM

  Porno is just a fairy tale land just as Die Hard and Fight Club are...men don't all have chiseled abs and rocket launchers - or 9in manmembers either. The hard truth is we are probably all average at best compared to the productions that come from Hollywood and the San Fernando Valley. Porn is good in moderation, just like going to the gym, or getting it on in a Superman getup - or like OMFG, A FUKIN HALF BABY NURSE OUTFIT OR SUMSHIT YA
• JLR
  3/16/2008 2:48:20 PM

  Hehe...those are super good points Bdub. We gotta keep it all in perspective. Hotness, like everything, in moderation. xoxo JLR
• blisss
  3/22/2008 6:45:36 PM

  i love watching porn and i don't mind if my partner watches, with or without me. although i sometimes play porn star in the bedroom (exaggerated moans and eye rolling while tossing my hair and/or humping/shaking my ass wildly, depending on what we're doing) i view porn as entertainment, not as something for me to worry about being compared to. if the person i'm with doesn't like MY body parts, then that's not the person for me any way. LOL
• JLR
  3/23/2008 10:03:41 AM

  That's the wonderful thing about being a sexually confident woman, you love being naked and are comfortable in your skin. If your potential sex partner isn't into you, you understand the fact that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, don't take it personally and move on. Just the other night I went out on the town where I attracted the attention of many gorgeous and not so gogeous men, except for one dude, a cowboy, (who I wouldn't get in the sack with anyway - cowboys aren't my thing) made it a point to tell me how distasteful he thought tattooed women are. I laughed, I didn't care in the least! It's a good feeling. Show me a man who appreciates a fair skinned, tattooed, redhead (so long as you fit my horny requirements too) and I'll show you some authentic ass shaking. Thanks for the comment blisss

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