Dear Dr. Dick,
Lately I’ve been noticing I am attracted to both males and females. So I don’t know if I am a lesbian or not? Is that normal?
Kate, Female, Age 20, Canada
Dear Kate,
Perhaps you are unclear on the concept. If you’re attracted to both
women and men, you could hardly be a lesbian, right? I mean think it
through, darlin’! A lesbian, by definition, is a woman who is ONLY
sexually interested in other woman. Apparently, that rules you
out…unless you are fooling yourself (and us) about being attracted to
men.
You are more likely bisexual — a rather common phenomenon in them female folk, don’t cha know!
All human sexuality is on a continuum. Probably it’s time to haul
out my Handy Dandy Kinsey Scale for all of us to have a look-see.
Wait, are you familiar with the Kinsey Scale, right? The dean of
American sex research, Alfred Kinsey, and his associates developed this
0 to 6 scale as a way of classifying a person’s sexuality in terms of
both behavior and fantasy.
This is what they developed.
0- Exclusively heterosexual with no same-sex behavior or fantasy.
1- Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual — most likely in fantasy only.
2- Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual — fantasy for sure and possibly behavior too.
3- Equally heterosexual and homosexual in both behavior and fantasy.
4- Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual — fantasy for sure and possibly behavior too.
5- Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual — most likely in fantasy only.
6- Exclusively homosexual with no other-sex behavior or fantasy.
These pioneering sexologists also discovered that an individual
could occupy a different position on this scale, at different periods
in his/her life. It’s conceivable that one could go from Kinsey 0 to 6
in a lifetime, or just a afternoon at the Lilith Fair, if ya know what
I’m gettin at. This seven-point scale comes close to showing the many
gradations that actually exist in human sexual expression. Amazing, huh?