To me, kissing is one of the sweetest things that two people can do. I don’t claim to be a stud, and the number of women on my chalkboard is not that great. In the forty-four years I’ve been sexually involved, I guess I’ve probably kissed over a hundred different women. Because I enjoy kissing so much, this might sound strange, but I can only remember two specific kisses and one kissing session.
The first kiss – right, I remember that one. Do you remember your first kiss? I’m not talking about the wet, sloppy things handed out by grandmothers, aunts, and other relatives as we’re growing up. With today’s sexual norms I was probably a really slow-starter, but in 1964 I was just a bit later than average when I got my first kiss at seventeen. There were three of us guys who had run around together throughout high school and one of them brought his girlfriend to graduation. After the ceremony she kissed him and it lasted about fifteen seconds or so and I figured that was normal, after all, they were BF and GF. Then she went to my other friend and kissed him. I was shocked when she kissed him right on the lips and it lasted nearly as long as the one with her BF. Then she came over to me.
By the time I was that age I had seen kisses in movies and knew I had to tilt my head to one side to keep our noses from bumping – but which way? I was starting to panic until I remembered I had just watched her kiss the other two guys and that she had tilted her head to the right. She came up, put her hands on my shoulders and pulled my head down to press her lips against mine. As I marveled at how soft her lips were, I almost panicked again as I tried to figure out what to do with my hands.
Have you ever noticed that women have hips that flare outward to provide a nice shelf on which to put your hands? That was the first time I ever noticed it as I gripped her and pulled lightly.
Oops, in just a few seconds I had to push her back a bit because, at seventeen, my body was responding to the warm, moist feel of her lips and the pressure of her body against mine. I certainly didn’t want her to feel the response that was working its way up between us. It was only hearing my friend say, “Hey, guys, break it up,” that caused me to pull away from her and realize that we had been kissing for close to a minute.
As we parted she merely said, “You’re a good kisser.” I’ve heard that other times over the years, but just figured the woman was trying to make me feel good and I never really thought about it a lot. I probably shouldn’t mention it, but what the hell, my first kiss turned out to be my second wife and the mother of four of my kids, so maybe that first kiss paid off.
You might think a man’s very first kiss would be his most memorable, but that’s not the case with me.
I was 45 when I met who was to be my fourth wife, Danielle. She was dating the bartender at my regular watering hole and one night he, for whatever reason, went home after work, leaving her at the bar. She and I had talked several times and we were sitting at the bar that night chatting about something inane when she suddenly turned and said, “Would you kiss me?” Okay, I’m a man and I have a beautiful young woman asking me to kiss her. Do I? I turned, leaned forward a bit, pressed my lips to hers, and – wow!
I tried, honest, I tried. She was dating a guy I knew and I really didn’t want to be responsible for their breaking up, but she was soooo hot! I pulled back after only a couple seconds and she pulled me back in and said, “No, I mean really kiss me.” Then she moved forward, pressed her lips back against mine, and moved her tongue around against my lips.
Within seconds I was sucking on her tongue and then pursuing it with my own as she pulled it back and we were so deeply involved that I didn’t even notice how much time had passed. Whatever things you’ve heard about electricity, it happened that night. I only remember that there was some song on the jukebox when we started and a different song was just finishing when we finally pulled apart.
How neat was that first kiss? We started dating the following week and, probably because of me, Danielle broke up with her BF and moved back in with her parents where I visited her a month or so later. Very religious, her parents were not about to allow us to have sex under their roof, so Danielle and I behaved until her parents went to bed around ten. She and I then sat at the dining room table and kissed. Nothing more – no feeling, stroking, or anything else – just kissing. A bit after four, her mother came down, informed us I should go home, and I left. (Looking back on it, I believe that I did, once, move my hand up to caress her breast, but I don’t think it was anything more than that. Keep in mind we had already slept together, so it wouldn’t have been out of line for us to do a whole bunch more, but we didn’t.)
How strange is this? I’ve been kissing women for 44 years and only remember three specific occasions: my first kiss, my first kiss with my last wife, and a period of six hours of kissing that same woman. No matter how I try I can’t remember any other specific kisses. I’ve been married four times and don’t really remember the kisses at our weddings. I don’t remember the first kisses with any of my other girlfriends.
Kissing is the one thing I’ve really missed in my recent relationships. For some reason, the women I’ve been with recently just want to fuck. All of which makes me curious about what other women think about kissing.
Ladies, do you like to kiss? Do you remember your first kiss? Do you remember any other specific kisses? I have been with women who love to kiss all through sex, others that don’t want to kiss at all once we get into the act, and others that kiss, push me away, kiss, and trade off all the way through sex. What about you? Are you like most (nearly all) and want to kiss afterward? Are some men good kissers and others not? Do you care? Does a man using his tongue put you off when kissing? Do you use your tongue when kissing? Let’s talk about that incredibly sexy, hot, and sweet act – kissing.
Originally published August, 2008