BOOBS
By Al Harrington
Have you seen this Internet joke?
Ten Things Men Know About Women
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. They have boobs.
Yep, men notice the really important things.
Casi un beso
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Martin Toyé
A couple years ago I had a contract to review porn video clips that required me to download a video, watch it, and then write a review of both the site and the clip. Although I enjoyed watching the clips, I noticed something that surprised me. For the first time in forty-some years of sex I noticed how women’s breasts did some incredible things while they were having sex. They jiggled, they swung in circles, they bounced up and down, and it was really fascinating to watch them.
Ladies, in case you never noticed it, men really enjoy women’s breasts. We like to look at them, kiss them, squeeze them, stroke them, and suck on them (possibly a return to infancy?). When it comes to size I’m one of those guys that doesn’t care if a woman’s breasts are large. I prefer smaller breasts, but I naturally enjoy looking at large breasts as long as they’re not too big. For me anything over a double D is too big and I’m not all that interested. I’ve never had the chance to try it, but I’m honestly not sure if I would enjoy sex with a woman who had enormous breasts. (Please note that I said I might not enjoy it, but I’d love to at least try it.)
I had one wife and three girlfriends who had rather large breasts. I had two wives with medium size and one with small breasts and I loved every single one of them (the boobs). I remember when one of my bartenders got an enhancement and, after she came back to work, took me into the storeroom to show me her new boobs. She had me lift them up and check out the fact that the scar hardly showed and said, “What you see will go away in just a few weeks.” Naturally, holding her boob up was really neat and I particularly enjoyed it when she then had me squeeze them a bit to see how natural they felt.
As with most things concerning women, they can be sooo different. I was in bed with a young lady once playing with her breasts, sucking on them, squeezing them, and generally having fun when she pulled my head away and said, “Stop, the feeling’s too intense. I can’t stand any more.” The other side of the coin was another woman who once told me she felt absolutely nothing when a man did anything with her breasts. There was also one who wanted her nipples pinched tightly and another that swore she could climax just by having a man play with her breasts.
Becky's New Ballet Boots
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Lochai
My current girlfriend, Diane, has mentioned that she enjoys having me play with her breasts, but also said, “It’s not a sexual pleasure, it just feels really good. I can’t see ever having a big “O” just from having you suck on my nipple.”
Okay, that’s a challenge, I enlisted her aid and we had sex twice one afternoon, both times somewhat according to a schedule: ten minutes of foreplay and fifteen minutes of sex. The difference was that I never even touched her breasts the first time and the second time I sucked on them, squeezed them, pinched her nipples, and even slapped them a couple times while we were screwing.
The result? “The second time was more enjoyable -- until you slapped them. I enjoy a smack on the leg or rear end, but I didn’t like that.” Other than that one thing? “Yes, it was more enjoyable overall when you were doing something with them.”
One thing that I’ve never understood is why women always want to change the way they look. Danielle frequently apologized for not having more for me to play with. Even though I kept telling her I loved what she had. She asked me a couple times if I wanted her to get an enhancement. I can almost understand it if a woman is in the entertainment industry or working in a sexual environment such as prostitute, stripper, dancer, or even a bartender or waitress. I can attest to the fact that big boobs are pretty much a guarantee of major tips in the latter two.
Bed Knobs
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Mike Crawley
One of the reasons I like O&C is that I learn things here. In one “Dear Jordan” letter, a woman said she was worried about having a hairy butthole. I made a comment and, in her response to my comment, Jordan said, “I'd like to assume that she's just like all of us women, picking apart her body down to the most minute of minute details to figure out what's left that's imperfect. I'm sure Holly is a drop dead gorgeous stunner who has her nails and makeup figured out and is just moving on to the next detail.”
That reinforced my feeling that a lot of women seem to be insecure about their bodies. Is the matter of having bigger boobs something as easy as just another of those “minute details” that a woman wants to take care of. Or is it something more complex like a status symbol: she wants a bigger house, a more expensive car, she wants D cups because all her friends have C cups?
Which brings us to the point where my curiosity kicks in. Ladies, are you dissatisfied with the size or shape or your breasts? If you’ve had a breast enhancement or reduction was it your idea or your lover’s? If it was not yours, why did you go along with it? Have you ever had a climax just by having a lover play with your breasts? Do you enjoy having your partner do something with your breasts while you’re having sex? What is it that you prefer?
Originally Published December 2009